Growing up Slowly, Overnight
A few things fall under this category, Growing up Slowly, Overnight, for me today. I will keep adding to this list, as time goes on. I hope to remind myself and everyone else who wears a human suit of the little things that could be universally helpful in our toolkits.
Here are three truth’s of mine today that I would like to share.
Move – Jump. Chase a dog or a kid. Take a walk. I watched a video some years ago of a doctor performing an autopsy on a dried-out bit of people jerky; human quad muscle that the doc separated with his knife. There was a sticky substance between the muscle that would melt when he rubbed the tissue together. Plaque. When we stop moving, plaque begins to form, even after we’re dead. It’s like a fine dust, and it’s sticky. As it layers on it becomes stickier and stickier. When we move, it literally melts away. You can feel it yourself when you are stiff after sitting for a while. Plaque. Lesson learned? Plaque is waiting to get us out of the way, it’s part of earth’s clean up patrol. If you are not in play, you will be put out of play. And we are meant to be exercising and moving our brains, too. Re-grooving with meditation. Reading. Thinking. Dancing. Plaque comes when we are sitting around mouth breathing. Move it, Baby.
When People Show You Who They Are, Believe Them – I have held these words of Maya Angelou’s closely and have had to learn this lesson again and again throughout my life. Mostly I think, because I am quite an empathetic person, from kidhood until now in my middle life. I could always find a cause and effect for someone’s general bad behavior. I would make excuses for them. I knew that poor person who was building walls, swinging fists, spewing hate filled words, telling me I was not enough, and sleeping with other people while they were going out with me, were really full of light. They were exceptional people who had been hurt, and were damaged, angry. That may be. But I feel quite differently now. I think we all have a duty to be on our best behavior, to be kind, even if we’ve been through the wringer. As Thumper’s Mother said in Bambi, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, then shut the hell up.” Sometimes, a jerk is just a jerk. Ain’t nobody got time for that. Now, I move towards other light filled souls who can express themselves without mocking and cutting down. No abuse. Life. Is. Too. Short.
Know your Limits and Prepare Accordingly – When my daughter Gilda was a baby, I decided to give her a haircut. The scissors were dull, and she was wiggly, and I have a relatively short attention span. Let me just say we both ended up in tears, and one of us was sporting a really bad hairdo. Twenty-three years later, she still holds a grudge. When I cut my kids fingernails I made them bleed. Same with the dogs and cats. I cut my own bangs horribly. I cut my ex-husband’s bangs, horribly. I am bad at cutting and styling things. I ordered a flat iron for my hair the other day and was giving it a try. My son walked by the bathroom, took a look at me and said, “Boy, Mom, you really don’t know what you’re doing.” So, I put the hair iron safely away next to the hair dryer and other things that I don’t know how to use.
My father recently wanted me to cut his hair. This was a terrible idea, for the obvious reasons above, but also because my father is terribly vain about his hair. He still has a full head of hair and in his younger days looked quite a bit like a cross between Richard Gere and Clint Eastwood. I knew this could be a very bad experience, most likely for me. I watched YouTube videos on cutting hair for several hours, drank a beer before the big haircut, and surprisingly did okay. Did well enough to get hired on for future haircuts with Dad. But I know I can’t just walk in there and rock it, as I can with other things I am good at. I need to get prepared.
So here are three lessons that I hope will hold serve you well, as they do myself. Move, Be Kind, Be Prepared.